"The word is not just a sound or a written symbol. The word is a force; it is the power you have to express and communicate, to think, and thereby to create the events of your life." Honoring the creative power of your word, what you say and what you think, is the foundation for the experience we create in our lives. The first words of the Bible are, "In the Beginning was the word, and the word was God, and the word is God." In the bestseller, The Four Agreements don Miguel Ruiz describes four agreements to live by to experience Heaven on Earth ~ another way of describing peace and happiness. The first and most important agreement is being impeccable with your word. At first I thought this simply meant that if I say I will meet you at 5:00pm, then I make sure to keep that agreement. If for some reason that is not possible, I let you know. While this is important, the deeper meaning of being impeccable with your word is to think and say loving and accepting words about our self and others. A challenging aspect of this is that most of the time we are asleep to the words that we say and the tape that runs in our mind as self-talk, our thoughts. For example, have you ever made a mistake and said, "I am so stupid," or "I never do anything right," or "My husband/wife is such an idiot." As you read this, you might be thinking, 'Yeah, I've said those things, what's the big deal?' The big deal is that what we believe is the experience we create. (Keep in mind that beliefs are simply thoughts that we have a habit of thinking and have come to think is truth.) Our thoughts create our reality. Our thoughts are the operating system of the life we create and live. If you want to see what you are thinking, look at the life you are living, it is the external manifestation of the thoughts you have had. Are you experiencing peace and happiness? If yes, consciously continue with the kind of thoughts you are having. If no, wake up to what you think and what you say and think thoughts and say words that support you in being peace and happiness. NOW. HOW TO DO IT Sit in silence each day and listen to your thoughts and consciously change them when they are not supportive of being peace and happiness. Start with five minutes per day and extend the length of time (to thirty minutes per day; twenty minutes twice per day; five minutes every hour ~ experiment). Day 1: Make a list of statements you can say to yourself that are kind, respectful and loving. Some examples are: Choose one of these statements each day and first thing in the morning and just before you go to sleep, say it to yourself while looking in the mirror. You can also write the statement on a Post-It note and carry it with you during the day to remind you to repeat the words once every hour. Day 2: Make a list of the statements you think and say about yourself and others that are abusive and judgmental. When you hear yourself say or think these thoughts have a new thought and change your language in the moment. It is crucial that you not judge and criticize yourself, as its another form of self abuse. When you notice abusive thoughts and words, acknowledge yourself for being awake and aware, and have a new thought. With this increased awareness you can make conscious choices about what you think and say. Day 3: Use your feelings as a guidance system, when you are feeling peace and happiness notice the thoughts you are thinking; when you are feeling angry, unhappy, sad, frustrated, alone, afraid notice what you believe at the moment. Remember it is not bad that you are having these feelings. We have the power to change our thoughts and thereby our points of view and beliefs. Day 4: Make direct statements (for example, "I'd like to go to the movies and I’d like you to join me," rather than "What do you want to do?") Often we know exactly what we want if we get quiet and focused enough to listen rather than hiding what we want in questions and vague statements. Day 5: Keep your word and honor your agreements. Notice the agreements you make with yourself and honor them; listen to the commitments you make with others and keep them. When you have to make changes in these agreements, allow your words to reflect you integrity. Two months ago I told someone that I planned to attend a course he was teaching. In the intervening weeks I changed my work schedule and was no longer planning to attend his course. I left him a phone message. As I was beginning to write this chapter he called and asked me about the course. I told him it didn’t work for me to take it right the. He said that if it didn’t work we could discuss being flexible with the schedule. I continued to say that it didn’t work for me and he asked me, “Is it that you prefer not to take it now or is it that is it that the schedule doesn’t work for you?” As I heard his question I knew that the truth was I preferred not to take the course now. I thanked him for his coaching. Honoring my word is saying what I mean! Day 6: Put reminders around your home and workplace to honor the creative power of your word. For example: Day 7: Write what you have learned about the creative power of your word. "You can measure the impeccability of your word by your level of self-love. How much you love yourself and how you feel about yourself are directly proportionate to the quality and integrity of your word." Excerpted from CHOOSE PEACE & HAPPINESS by Susyn Reeve with permission of Red Wheel/Weiser, Boston, MA and York Beach, ME. To order please call 1-800-423-7087. |
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